Friday, June 26, 2009

Officially Done...

Today is the last day of school.

wow.

I have officially taught a full school year term - officially, in China. No training, no experience, no degree or certificate. My head and heart are a fluster of thoughts, reflections, and emotions as I look back over the past 10 months: New experiences, sounds, sights, tastes, new relationships, some broken ones, deep discussions, miscommunications, tears, doubt, questions, frustrations, laughter, smiles, joy, my students, some new friends, China.

Alexi Murdoch seems to say it best right now:

Well I have been searching all of my days
All of my days
Many a road, you know
I’ve been walking on
All of my days
And I’ve been trying to find
What’s been in my mind
As the days keep turning into night

Well I have been quietly standing in the shade
All of my days
Watch the sky breaking on the promise that we made
All of this rain
And I’ve been trying to find
What’s been in my mind
As the days keep turning into night

Well many a night I found myself with no friends standing near
All of my days
I cried aloud
I shook my hands
What am I doing here?
All of these days
For I look around me
And my eyes confound me
And it’s just too bright
As the days keep turning into night

Now I see clearly
It’s you I’m looking for
All of my days
Soon I’ll smile
I know I’ll feel this loneliness no more
All of my days
For I look around me
And it seems He found me
And it’s coming into sight
As the days keep turning into night
As the days keep turning into night
And even breathing feels all right
Yes, even breathing feels all right
Now even breathing feels all right
It’s even breathing
Feels all right

I have such a long way to go in this life; in learning, growing, and changing to become more like my Saviour. Some days I feel like I've taken a million steps backwards, other days, leaps forward. But I did it. I have lived and taught here in China on my own for the last 10 months. It seems so short in retrospect...but every step counts. I only have done this with His ever faithful help. One day at a time.

He said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Most gladly therefore I will rather glory in my weaknesses, that the power of Christ may rest on me," - 2 Corinthians 12:9

2 comments:

Martha six said...

Thank you for sharing that song/poem.I will need to look up the author.

Jessie leigh said...

I am so happy for you! you are really expericening life and Changing the world because of your love for christ! your such an inspiration to me! I will one day hopefully be out there doing more of Gods works!