Friday, May 21, 2010


"I only love God as much as I love the person I love the least." - Dorothy Day

Think about that one for a while.


Friday, May 14, 2010

Spring weather, books, and learning grace.

May is halfway over here in southern China, and the summer warmth is slowly descending. The weather ranges from cloudy and dreary, to bursting sunshine and distant polluted clouds. The sky tries so hard to be blue and on some days, nearly succeeds, amidst the gray haze of pollution.

I do so miss sunshine and blue skies. I have concluded that I need it to survive - and not just for biological reasons (e.i. Vitamin D). It lifts my spirit, my being, my whole soul. A photograph of San Diego's Black's Beach cliffs covers my computer desktop at school, bringing memories of the beauty of home, a beauty I have come to appreciate being away.

I have been reading and have successfully finished several books:
"Soul Cravings"
"The Giver"
and I'm currently half-way through Yancey's "What's So Amazing About Grace?"

I feel so accomplished when turning the final page in a book, closing the back cover, and setting it back on the shelf. I feel accomplished doing some silly things like:
- making and crossing off lists (post-college life has made me a list-maker...)
- finishing glass jars of food. like almond butter. I find some sort of serious commitment when opening a glass jar of goodness and I don't like to see it go to waste.
- successfully completing a pilates workout, or yoga. ouch!

I have 6 weeks left of the school term and, while emotionally/mentally I am winding down, I'm trying to give my best and all these last few classes with my students. I was recently give the ENTIRE responsibility of teaching our summer school program, which began as an unreasonably huge request by my superiors. But with patience, prayer, and several conversations, there has been compromise and it will be doable. At the very least, it will be yet another learning experience for me - I'll be teaching the older grades, which I have never taught before, nor know the extent of their English knowledge,comprehension, or usage. Learn to swim by jumping in, right?

With each passing day I am hopeful for the future.

I am learning so much about grace.
about forgiveness.
about love.
about trust.

"There will be no escape from wars, from hunger, from misery, from racial discrimination, from denial of human rights, and not even from missiles, if our hearts are not changed." - Lance Morrow

Hoping for a changed heart as I leave China, to better show His grace and love to this broken world.